The 10D10 Interview Challenge
#12 – Chris Guhl, author, and talking cornstalk
Chris Guhl is from Iowa, so take everything he says with a kernel of corn. He seems like a nice guy, but at any point, he could pop, and we’d need a ton of butter to get things back under control. Chris wrote a really cool YA sci-fi novel called NAEVIA-18, and he’s currently riding the wave of a $25 royalty check which he assures me he’s going to set aside 30% of for the IRS.
Chris is a good dude who helped me promote The Phone during its pre-order and launch period, and I like him for other reasons too. Please don’t ask what those reasons are, as I haven’t thought of them yet. Wait, he photographs well. Handsome fella.
I rolled some dice to get some questions for Chris. This is what I got: 1, 3, 7, 7, 10, 9, 6, 8, 5, 10
Here are his questions, and subsequent answers, and our banter.
- What’s your favorite food?
PIZZA! Large pepperoni from Pizza Pit in Ames, Iowa. Doesn’t get any better than that (unless you add inferno wings).
Do they put corn on that pepperoni pizza? I bet they do. And you’re right, pizza is always going to be top 3, no matter what. Now as for the wings… I can’t handle too much spicy anymore. Tears me up and gives me the ninja shits.
- Plotter, or pantser, and why?
Pantser for sure, though I’ve been trying lately to have some type of rough outline before I let my characters loose with the reins. They tend to get themselves into situations I can’t think them out of, so having a general idea of what needs to happen has helped.
It never ceases to amaze me how much characters change the stories they’re in. You can plan all you want, but when you’re executing the story in the moment, the characters change so often and in unexpected and better ways. Writing is such a trip.
- What was the first movie you saw in the theater, and what did you think?
I believe it was the original Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles in 1990. Cowa-freakin-bunga, it was radical! Michelangelo still has the best backspin in history. I rewatched it the other day, and it’s still a classic.
That really is a classic. The original movie was such a watershed moment for pop culture and comics too. Changed a LOT of what we now enjoy for entertainment. You were lucky to have that be your first. Fun fact: I live near the city where the Ninja Turtles were first created! (Dover NH)
- Ever have a friend eat the leftovers out of your fridge? How did that make you feel? Where did you hide the body?
I plead the fifth. FIF!!! Though I will never forget that leftover steak I didn’t get to eat. NEVER.
FIF!! I will keep your secret. I will carry it to my early, pizza accelerated grave.
- Which would you rather do; have a nice cookout on a summer afternoon or dip your junk in the water?
Dipping my junk in the crappy pasta salad that someone brought to the cookout. NOBODY WANTS YOUR PASTA SALAD, LINDA! Give me a hot dog or a burger. In the end I’d prefer the pool/beach over stuffing my face, but can’t I have it all?
I suppose if you were to schedule some kind of cookout near a lake, or pond, you’d be golden. I guess you could do it near a pool, but then you’re either talking about being an elitist Richie Rich with the pool, or dealing with weirdoes swimming twenty feet from where you’re dipping your junk in Linda’s pasta salad.
Pros and cons all around.
- What’s something you’re saving up for?
A new computer, so I don’t have to write my stories using this ancient relic from 2011. I wrote most of Naevia-18 on an old iPad, using the on screen keyboard no less. It’s time to get modern. I plan on trading up my iPad and MacBook Air for something shiny and new.
I bet you do your accounting with an abacus. 2011? Shit. Is there a word size limit on a computer that old? I forget, it has been so long. Also, I can’t write on tablets. I have HUGE hands, so I am forced to either hunt and peck with like, six fingers max, or use a real computer with a real keyboard. I’m currently using a new laptop I got from a friend that’s like three feet wide. Looks like a fucking ironing board with a monitor attached.
- Exercise. Overrated, underrated, whatever. What do you do to burn calories and maintain your rock hard abs?
I’ve been doing headspins and backspins for nineteen years to keep in shape and impress the ladies. When that hurts too much I pop in P90X or Insanity and sculpt glorious dimples into my glutes.
GLUTE DIMPLES. I can add no further banter to improve this question and answer.
- What character’s death ripped your heart out and shat on it like a frat boy in a Porta-Potty at a Phish concert after some alley tacos and dollar beers?
I’m still reeling from Viserion in Game of Thrones, and bracing myself for what may happen in the final season. I think some alley tacos and dollar beers will make it all better though. I will be ripping some hearts out myself when I finish writing the sequel to Naevia-18. 😉
Spoiler alert, Chris, Jesus. I guess if you’re not caught up by now on Game of Thrones, you’re screwed no matter what, so be it. And yeah, that dragon going down was BRUTAL. And as for your sequel… ripping out readers hearts is really the magic we writers work with. Congrats on setting appropriate career goals.
- If you could automate a single task around your house with a robot, what would it be?
Everything to do with washing the dishes. Though it’s sometimes a chore even putting on clothes. If I could have a wristband like the girls in Naevia-18, then I could press a button and I’d have an instant outfit. I’d at least be clothed when the artificial intelligence in my dishwashing robot gets too advanced and the darn thing overthrows me.
You really gotta watch out for the artificially intelligent appliances. Can you imagine the chaos that a rogue KitchenAid would bring to the world? What about a blender? Or the ice maker in your fridge? CHAOS.
- What’s something (a trope, let’s say) that comes up over and over again in your genre that drives you frigging mental that you wish you could change?
The chosen one! One person is fated to save the world from imminent DOOM. Granted, there are some great stories out there that have a chosen one trope, or other cliches that have been overused in science fiction and fantasy. That one stands out the most to me. I still enjoy a lot of what I read though, so there are authors getting it right.
Now that I think of it more, did Naevia-18 have a chosen one trope? Was Naevia the chosen one? Am I my own worst nightmare!? Nah…
I can’t say much, as my post-apoc series revolves around the idea that the main character MIGHT BE the ‘chosen one.” Whether or not he is, is a big point of the story’s friction. So I guess I am okay with stories like that. With that being said, I totally see what you’re saying about the trope.
Killed it, Chris. Thanks for stopping in!
Christopher Guhl is a science fiction and fantasy author from Des Moines, Iowa. His debut novel, NAEVIA-18, released in December 2018 from Autumn Arch Publishing. Christopher picked up his love for writing at the University of Iowa, and in his spare time enjoys cosplaying, breakdancing, and hanging out with his wife and their little dog.
Link to Naevia-18:
great interview…lol